I Can't Adult Today #help

As I Watch This Generation Try to Rewrite History One Thing I'm Sure of It Will Be Misspelled and Have No Punctuation

Dieting Is Like Riding a Bike and the Bike Is on Fire and the Ground Is on Fire and Everything Is on Fire Because You're in Hell

My First Objective When I Get Home Is to Change into Something That Make Me Look Like I Am Homeless

They Call It a Selfie Because Narcissistie Is Too Hard to Spell

Millennial Handle with Fragile Thank You Caution Easily Offended Thank You

90s MANY MEMORIES NO EVIDENCE

LAUGHTER When a Smile Has an Orgasm

I Hate When People Ask Me What I'm Doing Tomorrow When I Don't Even Know What I'm Doing Right Now

I'm Going to Use up All My Old Makeup Before I Go Buy New Makeup

Rumors Are Carried by Haters Spread by Fools and Accepted by Idiots

This Millennial Runs on Coffee and Avocado Toast

At My Funeral Take the Bouquet off My Coffin and Throw It into the Crowd